SALT Soccer Camp… These Girls Rock My World!!!!!

Well when I first got to Cambodia I wrote this organization called pass back who donated 100 balls and other soccer supply’s it was supper sweet! For a few months I had a small camp going on Sundays however my counter part left and it started rainy season and never picked back up. With the realization without me there was no camp was really sad because it is not sustainable this lead me to the quest to make sure that I found a place the camp could be sustainable. This is how I came to find out about SALT they are a branch of fifa world cup the guy sam who is in charge of the camp is soooo great and has been living in Cambodia for the past 8 years and has started it from the group up and with this he has created the number one nationals girls team in Cambodia. He works on saving girls from migration work in Thailand, which for the most part means these girls were very close to being trafficked for sex. The main camp is in Battambang the girls range from 11-19 ish and participate in the SALT program and then are placed with various other organizations around Battambang to sleep though some of the girls are legal guardian of the SALT staff. While I would have loved to set something up long term in my village that is most likely not going to happen so instead I opted for a one day soccer empowerment basic skills training for girls I worked with another volunteer Alison who works at an orphanage 10 k away from my house. The camp ended up being more then just girls bc as the camp was going on more people where being drawn in. the best part about this camp it was entirely run by the 17 year old girls national team! I don’t think you can truly understand why this is sooo amazing to me but I will try to explain in a culture that tells girls that there uterus will fall out from playing sports and acting to much like a man will never allow u to get married it really is nothing short of a miracle to see girls rise above it. Having these girls run everything just took down a lot of the walls and nervousness the younger girls were feeling and I really got to see some of them transform. There was one girl from my village I think she is 11 or 12 now she had to drop out of school along time ago and goes around on her bike picking things up at the market and delivering it to sellers so she always came off so serous in part to survive I’m sure but I could just see how much she needed a release. The camp was good it helped show a vested interest girls have in sports when not having to fight for the filed or chance to play most of them wanted another day of camp. Second part of this camp I took my self up 4 hours up north to Battambang where the actual camp is run. The first day the older girls that I first met in my village where not there because it was thought school was starting that day lol im happy to know that its not just me that never can figure out when school starts ends and is on break bc turns out they were off by a week =) anyways this gave me a chance to really get to know the younger girls who were around 11 speaking Khmer helped me a lot to get to know them. Anyway I was able to help a little hear and there but for the most part they have trainer and are pretty well prepared for soccer so be4 lunch they took a break to play games that were not related to soccer. I was able to help this session bc the volunteer who tends to work it was sick anyways we played red rover, Indian chief, and concentration though have to say I had the most fun watching them play concentration bc they all tried really hard not to forget numbers and who was already out at first they thought it was easy until slowly people forgot who was out etc and repeated numbers.  After that I kept with there schedule and went to the orphanage and ate lunch with them the house mother I think got a kick out of me sitting on the floor with them speaking khmer she kept asking me if I knew how to eat rice which was the other funny thing how the stored rice for that many girls. I worked in a shelter before so I get having this big size but in America even with lots of people u have to maintain appearance of just like everyone else so the shelter feels more home like. Well the rice is stored in this huge tin thing that u also wash clothes in and they just rip into the rice then they get a bowel of soup to share in a group of about 5. The cool thing about being around them for the day is that they are not scared of me and they also did not put me on some American pedestal bc they were to busy just being kids ex they race for the front seat of the van and not once did anyone ask me if I wanted it when getting rice no one asked me if I wanted it first which I have become so used to it was nice to be on the same level for a day no celebrity status. After lunch they had the choice between dances and drawing class I sat in on the dance class. Seeing soccer players though and though try to take up dancing was really funny anyways watching them in dance class is when it hit me for what ever reason maybe bc they were falling all over them selves and really could tell there child hood and not yet disappeared or been robbed like so many kids but if they were not here with me right now they could be in a brothel in Thailand and that freaked me out. You could tell that at 11 they still don’t get what they escaped or what maybe there parents did on purpose to them instead they had this view of life that anything is possible if you try. Despite everything these are some of the psychological girls I have ever met not really no of them once mentioned my white skin or about wanting to go on a diet and stop eating rice bc there value system had been changed by something as simple as the game of soccer that was there motivation. None of them where stick thin they are just like a top athlete American soccer player I have high hopes that these girls can make the 2016 Olympic soccer team and be the first Cambodian soccer team to be part of the Olympics. The other awesome thing about this camp is it was really well rounded after dance class we went to the top bank in Cambodia where they got to ask question about how to work for a bank and how to open an account stuff about atm cards etc and you can tell they have been in environment to ask question bc none of them felt shy they just kept shooting out ideas. The bank was the first time all day I had to be reminded I was an outsider the guy working for the bank was acting way more concerted with me then he had to like wanting to know if he should speak in eng for me and im like dude this is not for me its for the players. Listening to them ask questions about how they can get money to study in other countries etc was inspiring it gave me hope that they know they have more worth then getting married that they are so much more then a wedding dress. The last part of the day I choose to go to a cooking class that was held at a high-end café the girls made home made banana bread sooo good. That night the country director of Peace Corps Cambodia was in town doing site visit so I sort of invited my self to dinner with the bb volunteers and got to scope around bb which is a really pretty place to see if you ever have the chance to see Cambodia. The next day I went back to the camp except they had another class on relationships which I wanted to see how it was run I tend to like to observe what is taught to kids in Cambodia. I think this is one aspect of the camp I might have not liked okay well in the teacher offense she was a nice lady who meant well its just she missed cultural issues and over emphasis gender behavior. She was trying to get across self confidence and conflict resolution with not just male female relationships but female on female which lead her to this statement that one often hears growing up “girls are better at communication they need to express where boys will just fight with each other and be over it” why this is not good to teach in Cambodia or anywhere it normalizes violence behavior of men to girls. It seems in many area girls are taught that boys cant control anger so they hit so how can a girl know its not okay for a boy to hit her if this is male normal behavior they don’t.  she also talked a lot about peer pressure and to not let it bring you down all well and good but she never asked them things that they are up against not to mention she left out about adults who pressure them bc its not just classmate I know my host mom tells my host sister to take weight loss meds and that everyone in my village young and old alike tells me I should use bleach on my skin to get rid of my freckles.  I just think her lesson had a very western approach and lacked a chance for them to express what they are going though or culturally what they have faced bc that would teach her something to. Another blunder while its might raise self esteem on a superficial level was we got in pairs (yeah I participated) and had to say what we liked about our selves physically and then something about our partner I was interested in that my partner said she liked her skin I’m sort of used to Khmer girls telling me they hate how black they are but she was happy with it so that was nice. But the down side we are still teaching a value of beauty as it exist is a male dominated system like I said this lady meant well its just sometimes we don’t realize what we are teaching between the lines esp with girls empowerment and gender topics in general. After I did a short health session on hand washing and then got a free ride back to my site from Peace Corps. Until next time peace out from the other side of the world!!!!! 

PS THE SOCCER TEAMS NAME IS MIGHTY GIRLS CHECK THEM OUT! 

yep so this is what you get to work with in the village life loves that kids overalls!

warm up relay races

big green the movie remember that movie... yeah we had to share the field with cows in the village

flash monsoon time to come in

some of the younger girls from bb camp

action shot

The Post Article

This is the Link to the article but I posted it below for your reading enjoy ment. http://www.phnompenhpost.com/index.php/2012072557588/Lifestyle/cambodians-and-expatriates-take-back-the-night.html 

Cambodians and expatriates take back the night

Wednesday, 25 July 2012 Dagmarah Mackos

Even a newcomer to Cambodia is familiar with one grim fact about the country: its reputation of widespread sexual violence and human trafficking.

With a refreshing take at tackling this throbbing issue, last week several NGOs joined forces with Cambodian and international artists hoping to reach a larger audience through visual arts and discussion.

Take Back the Night, a global-scale initiative, saw its local incarnation from July 18 to 21 through a series of special events organised by Artworks for Freedom, within the framework of Meta House’s month-long Free Your Minds Festival.

AWFF founder Kay Chernush said she wanted to breathe new life into an old issue, and “involve many artistic expressions, so that it could provide new entry points into a very dark subject that some people don’t know about or don’t want to know about”.

Her idea materialised in the intimate setting of Phnom Penh’s Meta House where a small group of foreign and Cambodian guests delved into the horrors of victims’ lives as they watched Fields of Mudan – a short drama about a young girl whose dreams of a better life are ruined by the brutal reality of a Chinese brothel.

Dancing boys of Afghanistan, a documentary by Afghan journalist Najibullah Quraishi, followed suit, and long-standing NGOs like Action pour les Enfants continued with a slide show and discussion on their work around the issue.

The more curious visitor would have been drawn to the colourful T-shirts hanging innocently on laundry ropes – a display prepared by two American activists, Elizabeth Johnk and Eileen McCormick, and a handful of Cambodian volunteers who succeeded in convincing child victims to pour their feelings onto the garment canvas.

It’s the second time that the young international social workers, who aren’t affiliated with any local organisation, focus their efforts on a problem which they believe hasn’t been adequately addressed despite many existing initiatives.

But if the cause is admirable, they admit that touching gender issues in a foreign land is often frowned upon.

“We put up with all the expats who were saying they had already helped the orphans. Some people would simply say it’s a stupid idea,” said Johnk, adding that she’s even been called a “feminazi” by critics.

So can foreign hands meddling with what may be perceived as local traditions or customs do any good? As the old controversy rages on, these activists trust that “there’s a respectful way to go about it”.

“Adults and children from all different backgrounds participate in a project like this and even if they’re only thinking about this on a slightly different level than before, I guess I’m OK with that,” said Johnk, who is looking forward to next year’s challenge. 

Meta House Opening

I think I mentioned a few times about the 2^nd part to my take back the night project and it went down this past month. There was a free your mind exhbit and we got to part take in it by adding the shirts from take back the night. For a few month we have been putting this together designing how we would set up the rope etc and there was also a slideshow to show the making of the project how it started sort of a deal which I posted up already try to let it fully load before you play it. The slideshow took a supper long time to make because choosing music to fit the situation I have a new found appreciation for movie and tv shows who ever job it is to pick the music. Well I wanted the volunteers to come but in order to this I had to suck up the cost of 40 dollars to rent out a van which pretty much put me and broke this month luckily today I get paid bc I ran out of money on my phone and internet and have been counting down to be able to buy more time for both. Along with the volunteers from my village coming my students came as well o yea I guess I might not have mentioned but in order to afford Khmer lesson I am exchanging that for me teaching one hour of conversational eng everyday. Well me and my khmer tutor thought it would be a good experience to let the students come to the art gallery to one see what an art gallery is and two practices there English with people from other countries. However I had to go in early to Phnom Penh to set up and that left me in trusting my khmer tutor to make sure everyone was on time and left when I said which NATURALLY DID NOT OCCURE SIGH. Well that morning me and liz waited around for meta house staff to set up the rope etc which took far longer then excepted then liz had to run off to work that’s the thing about being a pcv lots and lots of time to do the little stuff that people who have a real job cant do. Part of the exhibit we took close up pictures of people and cut out the eyes and placed mirrors in them and placed them on the line a lot of people seemed to really freak out when looking at these pictures. We did this to symbolize how violence is not happening to only one person but all of us and if you had to see your self though a victims eyes what would you do? Well that night when the event started not that many people showed up and my Khmer tutor left an hour late so that screwed up things. With traffic and everything else they did not make my part of the show so to speak there was other ngos and presenters there to show a movie and sex trafficking which they did make the students had a lot to say about the movie. One of the NGO’s APLE went out of there way once they realized I brought villages in to have everything translated into khmer which I thought was really nice. I know that seems something that should be protocol but honestly in the Ngo expat community it tends to be English only =( and most people don’t care or think about making it in the local la. Well the event over all was pretty uneventful the people who did come thought it was an interesting way to educate about violence in Cambodia the Phnom Penh Post came and while she was not planning on it she started to interview people and write up an article on the project ill post that in another post. We tried to sell shirts etc to make money for next year but that was a fail. I felt sort of bad by the time we got back to the village it was 11 at night I hope the students parents were not to mad at me I think it was an over all good experience until next time peace out from the other side of the world!

Summation of this summer thus far

This summer has been flying by with colors and sorry to report I have not kept you updated. First ill go into the cream of wheat guy came back aka my host sisters husband always a ranging good time. Issues number one everyone seems to assume bc I am American and he is America we will get along and have a great time. Things they fail to see he is as old as my dad speaks supper slow is racist and is not capable as seeing Khmer people as people. If this is all coming out bitter it’s because this last trip was a real dammed if you do dammed if you don’t type of situation or in khmer as they say on land there is tiger in water there is crocodile. This time around he took away the little candor he had the first time he came to vist and this caused a lot of issues for jentee and they’re for me. How to explain everything first ill start with “saving face” this is a khmer cultural concept that is used all the time and the rules are real hard to follow and I mess up on them all the time in all honesty ex if someone wrongs you its you who will lose face if you yell at them in public so basically being pissed off in public is bad. Well cream of wheat guy was pissed the whole time it rained to much he didt want to be in the village he didt want to be around chury the 3 year old or around my host mom the list goes on. However he did not just act agitated but stomping feet etc like a child who is not getting what they want. Now to save his face jentee says he is not angry im supposed to go along with this however here is the dammed if you do dammed if you don’t situation in America when someone is that pissed and you ignore them and treat them like a child it is really insulting and rude. Well I thought it was to obvious to play dumb and I hate how Jentee goes into denial with cream of wheat guy about almost EVERYTHING and it for the most part is actually hurting her relationship by American standards and in my option a form of self mutilation at best. My actions where the following I told him I understood even if most times he was being rude and to the people around him he was offending just saying he doesn’t understand and is slow. Well this makes jentee lose face bc you know saying someone is stupid is not nice in any culture but cream of wheat dude is not normal that’s all I know but ironically thinks he is soo much smarter then Khmer people it’s a train rec to watch. If you think this is all bad it gets worse well for someone like me I guess its no shocker to most of you but I have a pretty big hang up on human rights and even more so in women’s rights and while it takes every fiber of my being to tolerate him but for him to talk to me about his moral objectification to prostitution is where I went in the bathroom and scream no really. I don’t think I had any conversation that was not worry some however him telling me how much he thinks guys who sleep with prostitutes and especially child prostitutes should have there dick chopped off and how he wanted me to know that women get sold in Cambodia all the time…. I AM NOT KIDDING YOU I left went to the bathroom screamed came back out and then asked him about marrying someone he knew for 2 secs hoping he would connect the dots no such luck. I could go on about cream of wheat dude but ill spare you instead he informed me he was not coming back to Cambodia until my host sister has her interview which I don’t know if that will happen bc all the document I told him to bring where supposed to be new and he brought the ones from 2007 I swear I think he is playing stupid or something with me I cant figure cream of wheat dude out but it reminds me of the book of 48 laws of power. Well there is always two sides to every story right and seeing it from not the same cultural view point inevitable leads to issues which is was happened with me and my host sister jentee both of us were deff not exactly happen with each other but I just sat her down which im sure is not culturally the thing to do but I don’t care and just sort of hacked out a lot of stuff and things have been really good now with me and her. On other news the Asean meeting took place and Hillary Cliniton was in Cambodia at the last min Peace Corps invited some volunteers from a lotto system to attend a small meet and greet with her and I was lucky enough to get picked.  It was held at the Raffle’s Hotel with a small group of people about 60 people all embassy workers and a special photo op setup for the kids of the embassy workers. Security was tight we had to show up real early and wait for a few hours then after had to wait more time so she could take more pictures out side the door with the military staff. Meeting her was interesting she has such a stoic clam presence and I thought it interesting to see how they “made her up” for south east Asian culture what I mean by this is she had on just the type of clothes and makeup that impress Cambodians her hair was slicked back and she wore this huge diamond necklace that the American media would have crucified her or any politicians for wearing. She only spoke for like 10 mins and it was pretty typical stuff of where Cambodia was and where they are now and how America played a role in helping achieve that. I mean don’t get me wrong I get its all saying shit for political stuff but its like every country not just American that comes into Cambodia says the same stuff and never calls out how corrupt so much of this stuff really is. However I also realize I am no better bc I have to work with in the system to. Some good new I found an apartment its 3 bed rooms wrap around porch and even has hot water in it!!!!! Its supper nice im sharing it with Liz and her boy friend Pon its all been exciting. My Khmer tutors younger brother just recently informed me about some course being offered in development at a local university that is made by NYU staff so me and him are planning to take some classes in the fall together I guess I should mention its taught in English and the classes are offered on weekends and I think it could be interesting to take a few classes to get a better handle on grant writing and development in general so these are I guess what im working towards for next year. Until next time peace out from the other side of the world! 

shaking hands 

my host moms 65th bday

kids playing jump rope

jentu made it to the party from the rain

a storm is coming 

Meta House Slideshow TBTN

So this is the Slideshow we had playing the night of the opening at Meta House I will update a full blog soon about the Exhibit with pictures until then enjoy the slide show!

MTV EXIT END GENDER VIOLENCE

Hey so its been along time coming but the project went down with the help and support of so many of you in America and the great turn out of volunteers. The event took place in Koh Kong down south in Cambodia on the boarder. Well this place was pretty far for everyone to get to so it was quite the treck for the 15 volunteers that came out to help however its considered a beach so many of the volunteers were excited about this most of them despite being from Cambodia have never been to koh kong so it was an over all adventure with a work component.  Liz had the brilliant ideas to get shirts made up so we could look more legitimate so she had these shirts designed and they came out amazing all the volunteers loved them! Naturally the first part of the project had to go not as excepted so that morning me and liz talked to an mtv exit rep who failed to mention to us that the venue changed which cost us 8 more dollars to have our Cambodian tent moved to the river side. However this new local was perfect for foot traffic and getting a variety of age ranges to entices people to draw on the shirts we did have prizes liz went out and bought some cell phones tennis rackets etc naturally the real prize was the cell phone. I also might add I never go the donation of shirts so I had to buy them Khmer market style u r wondering what this is refer to pictures but I bought 500 random shirts and had to wash them all by hand for this event my host mom started to pity me after the first 200 and started to help me =) but we ended up needing about 250 shirts for the event.  We bought a variety of art supplies hoping the shirts would be really unique and different this year, which I can say they were interesting however for the most part they were always done in big groups of 5 or more I guess its just Khmer culture. The shirts messages were more stop violence vs personal experiences though there was a few that differed from the normal message. It was cool to see how much people liked the opportunity to do art work it was fun to watch someone who has never used spray paint get to try there hand at it lol if you see all the scissors we bought were used as a stencil for said spray paint they are colors of the rainbow. All the volunteers also created shirts to show ex of ideas in hopes they would not all be the same which sort of worked bc I think the using paints on ones hands was pretty popular and they really liked to use the Chinese money and chain. Despite me and liz being less that ideal organizer the event was pretty well executed until it came time for the prizes and it sort of became a cluster fuck. Instead of us just picking the winner we let the participants decide in order to do this we wanted them to line up behind the shirt they thought was the best of course some cheating occurred where one group would have a lot more people with them but ahh it seemed like the only fair thing to do bc they really wanted to win. Jentee who has never done work like this and I thought would be the hardass started to feel sorry for the kids telling me what will we do when they don’t win bc they all kept asking her if they were going to be number one. The khmer Eileen across the street from me is a really quite shy person but she has a knack for education and handing out materials it was cool to see her come out of her shell and do more ngo work. Some peace corps staff came out to and liz students it was just a mix of so many types of people which made the event work so well but to see all these people interact for a weekend while entertain did become draining. Later in the day mtv exit remps came over to apologize about the mis communication I think in part bc the event ended up being bigger then they excepted and we really did help promote the concert for later that night thought not going to lie I wish they took us more seriously to begin with. That’s the thing about being a two man ngo with no name or back up or funding you have to put up with being considered lower of the food chain I hope this changes for me one day. Another cool thing that happened was some random guy came while I was at lunch to take pictures of the shirts and wanted to buy some of them and gave us 30 dollars for the cool idea.  That night what I thought at the time was the group’s idea to meet up for dinner at some khmer soup place is when things started to go ary. So a majority of the khmer people that came with us wanted to go eat dinner as a group and everyone seemed fine with that and going to get soup however that was not the case bc all the Americas don’t really like soup including me however bc I thought this is what the majority wanted I just planned to suck it up go and get food later. This was an issues bc they over order pots of soup and then I guess they thought even people who did not eat should pay however khmer culture they of course would never say it directly so instead certain people where upset sulking my khmer tutor was one of these people. That night we split up and some of went to the concert club and others got more food  it was not until the next morning that I started to realize something was sort of not right sigh what I mean by this half the group wanted to go to the thai market and the rest wanted to go to a waterfall or something. We had two cars however bc of the night be4 my khmer tutor in particular was on his guard to get his way which he is suborned to begin with but he would not listen to a word I said to him that morning. People often joke that him and me fight like brother and sister anyways I was trying to get him to understand we should take one car to each place not to leave people out but he rushed off and refused. Last night I talked to him about this cuz I was sort of pissed about his infantile behavior bc at that point and time he still never mentioned he was pissed. Anyways he realized last night he was wrong and he was sorry I sort of feel a bit like I don’t know if I could have changed that situation or handled it better. Looking back though at that point and time the project was done I was not going to boss people around or take a leadership role for where people want to go in their free time. Well the hour they promised they would be at the market was more like 2 and ½ so we did not go to a waterfall bc of lack of time we went to the resort with the mangroves and then had a huge sea food lunch with crab etc it was soo delicious. We headed back at 130 which means we got in really late and we also had to stop 5 million times on the way back home for fruit and other things for people to bring back to the village but overall despite some mis communication and cultural difference I am happy with the outcome of the project and the trip in general. Peace out from the other side of the world. 

this is how it pretty much was all day for us minus lunch time

2 of liz's students starting there own shirt

she let the kids paint her hair jk

group effort to make a shirt to win the prize

the kid who made this was like 8 he came to late and missed his prize we felt sorry for him and gave him 5 bucks translation of shirt women are gentile and nice so you should not hit them.

alot of volunteers like this shirts haha whoever this kid is has a british english teacher love it!

hanging up the shirts we like the best for the vote

Gender and Development in Cambodia aka GADC has the best eng khmer gender educational stuff ever! this is some of the kids reading the news on pressing gender issues. 

500 shirts washed by hand wish i could say i have arms of steal but nope.

I think this picture sums up all the types of people that helped make this project what it was!

PS STAY TUNED FOR THE NEXT PART OF THIS PROJECT ART GALLERY AT METAHOUSE SO EXCITED!

  

Best Quotes from tabling

Okay so take back the night close pin line around the corner a few hundred short from goal needed we went back to lucky supper market. Since I have a blog post on tabling in Cambodia I thought this one I would just do best funny quotes convos I endured on my two day table excursion.

Random American couple about 50 years old “o what work r you doing that’s great but we come back every year for 3 months to work in the orphanages so we are doing out part already”

My response “That’s great umm any little thing we can do” in my head “im not asking for ur bank account if u have a penny that would be great”

A judge I think British “o I am a judge so I know all there is to know about violence I see it in my court everyday and I have so many charities I donate to already”

Me “o u work in the court system what do you think of all the corruption of the legal system Cambodia”

Judge “o that’s not my concern but I can tell you this you will never be able to stop violence or prostitution in Cambodia it is the fabric of there society”

Me in head “great the judge uses prostitutes every night and me putting a stop to that behavior is the end of his fun” what I actually say “well its certainly not going to happen with me alone there needs to be a cultural shift of equality between sex’s world wide”

Random ngo worker French “you know there is more pressing issues in Cambodia and you might want to concentrate on them”

Me “can you give me an example” 

French dude “children that’s where it matters”

Me “sure children matter but we need to go to the root of the issues why so many of them are forcibility abandoned”

European Women 40’s “o your with the un I will never give you a cent” storms off

Me “wait I don’t work for the un that’s just some educational materials I have” quickly accepting a lost cause.

Repeat offender “why do I recognize you”

Me “ooo I know y because last time I did this you freaked out on me”

Repeat offender “o no what did I do”

Me “you told me that I should be ashamed of my self for working for peace corps and they are the worst organization ever they do more harm then good”

Repeat offender “omg that’s right but no I saw something about u yesterday… hey ur doing work for metahouse”

Me “yea hey how did you know that”

Him o im in charge of getting the funds for the project I like ur idea

Me in head “once hated by this dude now we r friends people really can change =)”

Missing his teeth dude “I have a Cambodian wife so im not like the expats”

Me in head “really that’s exactly what an expat does” Me “that’s great”

Missing his teeth dude “I don’t need to be educated on the situation in Cambodia my wife’s father beat her and all his girls”

Me “that’s terrible im sorry to hear that”

Missing teeth dude “yea he still beats people up”

Me in head “I wonder if this abusive father is the one who arranged his marriage to his daughter” me “well I hope you can find away to help the situation”

Missing teeth guy walks away quickly then turns around to tell me “ you see I could write a book on sexual abuses u have know idea how much I know”

Me in head “what else is there to say” “well sir I hope you do write that book im sure it will be an educational read”

20 something American SEXPAT in the Hawaiian shirt “I am going to read about your project first ill hit u back on my way out”

SEXPAT in the Hawaiian shirt “can you please define what your definition of sexual violence is”

Me “any unwanted forced sexual touch”

Sexpat in the Hawaiian shirt “if that’s the case I can’t in good conscious donate to your project”

Me “I’m sorry what about that definition don’t you agree with”

Sexpat in the Hawaiian shirt “when I think violence I think it has to be extreme and has to be rape with penile penetration”

Me “gives ample examples of violent sex acts from using a knife to use kissing someone to more extreme examples that his definition leaves out”

Sexpat in the Hawaiian shirt “but that would mean I could be considered a rapist and im not”

Me in head “yes that exactly the issues u don’t see ur self for the rapist u r bc u get away with so much and not enough people inform u that what you are doing is rape”

Me “well maybe that’s something u should be thinking about”

Sexpat in the Hawaiian shirt “you need to see how wrong you are and that if this is how you or ur organization defines sexual violence u should put it on ur information about the project so people know what they are donating to”

Me thanks for the advice

Okay so on the flip side I would like to say there were a lot of people who where engaged in learning about what we were giving out. Not to mention some people gave a lot of money in hopes to help a dead ancestor who was a victim of abuse. Just something to think about how seriously some people can take what me and liz say to them and how for a myriad of foreign workers in country feeling what they do is good enough and r above talking with me or liz says a lot. Anyways peace out from the other side of the world!!!