Friday, December 31, 2010

Chandler Caviar and Hallucinations 2011





Before I go into my night I will educate you on something I read on yahoo thank the yahoo gods later…so that famous new years eve song we all seem to hear over and over but have no idea what it all means where it comes from well I have the answer Auld Lang Huh translate into "for days past," "days gone by," or "for the sake of old times," depending on whom you ask. Before leaving site I tried to convince my friend Jentee to come I told her I would pay for her in hopes she would come bc we actually hang out with other Khmer people not just all American people so I thought it would be fun to bring her along and she seemed all excited to come to a party with me but then she backed out at the last min. truthful im not sure if it really was that she was nervous but she is married to this American I think I have mentioned before and I think he gets mad if she goes dancing etc without him so I feel like she is always worried about what he thinks and I so wish she would not care or that I would talk to his ass on the phone and just tell him dude chill out but I guess I cant medal in someone else relationship as much as I might want to. Most of you most likely don’t understand the title of this blog I will explain so last night I got to see how the other “half live” so you have all seen pictures of my village life now imagine just throwing ur self into the exact opposite of situation it was crazy weird! At least I know where all my sites electricity goes jkjk. Anyways last night first I went to some small bars on the river and then went to a casino with chandlers and really fancy nice stuff it was some sort of vip room for rich Khmer people and I think embassy people I don’t really know how I got in. never the less its funny how things can change like a flip of a dime in Cambodia so on the way to the vip party as I will refer to it a bunch of volunteers bc we are so poor jumped into a tuk tuk meant for 4 people filled it with 10 I didn’t make it in I ended up sitting out side on this little rail that connects the Moto to the kart great fun however the interesting part was that tourist lined up out side are tuk tuk to take pictures of us which to us was funny bc the record for peace corps right now is 14 people in a tuk tuk which is true Cambodian style of riding around guess tourist r just not aware of these rules. Anyways we go from saving money on a tuk tuk ride to entering a vip party just the décor really made me feel like the night was not real like I seriously forgot I was in Cambodia minus all the Khmer people around me and cheesy club cover songs happening haha. I guess you can say I had my first movie type new years bc in the sates it was to expensive to go to that type of place even in Cambodia drinks were 5 bucks which in Cambodia is like 20 dollar drinks American so I could not afford to drink their however I guess I got to dance and meet some interesting people I met some new Khmer people and someone from Madagascar I feel I have been meeting people from all around the world lately. I also met this Khmer girl who started to hang out with us just dancing and when I went outside to get air she came with me and was talking to me or rather telling me that this was her first time dancing like a westerner that if you family in her village ever found out how much trouble she would be in and how they would never let her come back to Phnom Penh I just was like yea I understand I think my host parents would not approve either like I said above things really are polar opposite from how most day to day life is in Cambodia. This place even had fire works and o yea if you called me for new years eve thanks sorry I could not hear you grandmamma and then met phone (Cambodian cell company) got over loaded with calls so they were just dropping me with who ever called and I could not call out but that’s how it goes I guess. All I can say this new years was not what I ever would have expected a Peace Corps Cambodia New Years Eve to be! Well now for the part everyone is dying to know jkjk what are my new years resolution and I think ill try not to go with the lose weight typical answer but instead go with learn Khmer, dig further into the meaning of life or seeking the truth, and completing all the projects I have set up to do in Cambodia and be a productive volunteer. “What a fool does in the end, the wise do in the beginning”. On that note have a happy and safe 2011 peace out from the other side of the world just keep in mind the only mistake we can make in life is not to live it fully!!! Miss you all hope your new beginning works out well!

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

I AM THE YELLOW COLOR






I feel like this is one of those movies where first they show you a clip of what is happening in the present but then goes back to how it all beings to imagine me laying in my hammock with big gobs of yellow I don’t know what food maybe I really am not sure all over me turning me the yellow color and then I will take you back just like a movie. So over the weekend I had a minor bike accident I am fine just a few scrapes nothing to really freak out about just almost got hit by a moto and trying to prevent this sort of skidded out I grew up in a house hold where I was always told to take a warm bath to make anything that was wrong better while most cases it never really worked I think it kept me quit so I didn’t bitch and I think made me brush off anything serous or to know well enough not to bring it up just to turn on the hot water. I have been cleaning and doing what I can with the situation however back at site this has allowed everyone in my village to be deathly concerned for me when the hospital staff got a peek they gave me pills not quite sure what these pills are and how pills are supposed to cure scrapes but ill say for argument sake that maybe its to prevent infection like antibiotics then again I don’t remember antibiotics looking the ways these pills do but this is not how come I am now the yellow color. I don’t know if its bc in Cambodia there is no warm baths for moms to make there kids to get in that they come up with the stuff they do but after work I went over to Jentees house she was still at the market so I hung out with her mom speaking Khmer about my trip when she started to ask me if I showered yes this is a normal questions for a Cambodian to ask bc she saw what she thought was dirt on my foot which was really a cut and I was like yes this is not dirt but a cut then she began to inspect my legs and before long she saw the big cut on my leg it self this caused her to freak out and no sooner did her freak out occurred did Jentee get back and some random person that was buying stuff from their shop so I was forced to show my cuts and now they all think I am going to die but seriously jentee was like I knew there was a problem on the phone I was like no problem sigh sometimes there really is no talking down a Cambodian so now that I have cuts I am sick yes sick that’s right and I keep telling them I am fine anyways I go home for lunch putting this all behind me or so I hopped I should have know better I guess wishful thinking just doest work well for me. Mean while I was hopping not to get my family involved but after lunch I was watching a movie and studying Khmer when Jentee’s mom comes over with this big bowl of I don’t know what to rub all over me so mean while I have put iodine and other cleaning things on this cut for it to be x out with yellow passed see pictures above hah so now I have an ace bandage around my knee holding in yellow passed I have stuff on my elbow and all over my feet with no idea what’s in it all I can say it sort of stings on my knee. I thought about taking it off of course that crossed my mind but I didn’t want to be culturally offensive bc she clearly went out of her way to make me her witch dr medice so I figured the least I can do is wear it around the village for the day right? Well new years is around the corner as well as a peace corps health meeting so until next time peace out from the other side of the world!

Quick update turns out this stuff is yellow turmeric and gin peace corps drs r not happy with me right now lol!

A DAY IN THE LIFE OF A FISH






So due to the fact I am a whole day a head of you I thought I might split this blog into my Cambodian xmas and then American xmas. Thanks for calling me sorry I was out of it bc it was 5 am my time and I had to be up in an hour to go diving so I was sort in a daze and all the people I was sharing a room with were a sleep so I was trying not to wake them up anyways I hope you all had an awesome day and had lots of food. To celebrate in honor of America I took a full day trip to go scuba diving the boat ride was a good 2 hours off shore they provided breakfast and lunch it was an interesting boat ride. So first let me tell you I did not go with anyone I knew bc not to many other people I know are certified and a lot of people are pretty scared to go deep down where if something goes wrong it could mean life or death however this leaves opportunity to meet new people fellow divers which all happened to be from all over the place there was a couple from Holland, Germany, new Zeeland, Canada, Malaysia, and an American couple who are living in Vietnam teaching eng anyways everyone was really awesome and its always cool to hear there back stories. I have to say I really sometimes wonder why Americans are so much different then Europeans what I mean by this one of the great things about living in Cambodia I meet a lot of crazy backpackers who are like yea I worked for two years and then I quit to travel for a few years and no one seems to think this is a big deal however in America or even when I meet Americans in Cambodia its like a month is the longest they can go without working and having a job why is this? Its like traveling is not an acceptable excuses for us to just up and leave a job never the less this is exactly what most of the people on this boat with me were doing telling me where they have been in southeast Asia and their plans. Side note for some reason most people from other countries love to ask me about our health care system I guess they really see ours as a big mess while im not commenting one way or the other I just wonder how much media coverage they see about our system. Back on topic okay so the island we got to see was really pretty small and full of exotic life however we quickly left to go on our first dive which, was about an hour I think we did about 100 ft down have to admit I was a bit nervous bc I have not done any diving for over two years which tecnecquly I supposed to have to proved my skills in a pool or something if its been that long but hey im in Cambodia so that matter a bit less then it would in other parts of the world. The water was a bit choppy current mildly strong it made visibility not as good however the ocean is still pretty clear blue so it was still amazing to see the sea life the things that I love a lot about being that far down is that it’s my own personal form of yoga I am pretty horrible and regular yoga bc you have to sit still and monitor your breathing stop thinking and I just cant seem to do it. However with scuba diving its like I have no choice I had to watch my breath drift slowly I don’t really think im to into seeing what’s around me its like active yoga I love it!! I was hopping to see a turtle but did not however I saw crazy big fish and schools of fish that were bright blue swimming right up to me and there was bright purple coral and a bunch of all plant life I feel like I saw in the discovery channel LIFE series which made it all that much better bc I knew how rare it was to see Cambodia diving is basically up and coming it has a lot of potential however not many people have been diving in Cambodia yet which leaves a lot to be discovered. So there was these pin things that I had to watch out for they were big and black with the center looking like that eye they use in Egypt to ward of evil sprits the dark blue and white and light blue and a spec of purple in it I guess its made from calcium someone that was snorkeling accidently landed on one and her knee had all these black spots bc I guess u cant take them out u just have to rub them in over time or so the dive instructed was saying. On my second dive being more curious and perhaps less nervous I was able to really get up close to some of the plant life and things which made the second dive a bit better also first dive I had trouble equalizing so I removed weight from my belt I know this is all scuba talk so you have no idea what im saying but basically I was going down to fast the first time due to too much weight on my belt making my ears hurt. On the way back despite scuba being a lazy persons sport due to the lack of oxygen etc it really tires you out so on the boat ride back to the main land I sat up top laying down and taking pictures of the sun set could not as for a more beautiful day out on a boat ps the boat had peanut butter no one but me seemed as excited lol if only they understood why I was so excited. Wishing everyone a healthy and happy holiday from the other side of the world!!!

So This Is Xmas what have we Done






Another year over a new one to begun war is over if you want it! Sometimes its odd how my ipod shuffle with hit up just the song one needs to hear on xmas john Lennon so this is xmas with yoko came on it made me think how crazy it is not to long ago war was knocking on Cambodia’s door step and how far the country has come and all the things I have never had to experience that so many people I interact with on a daily bases have faced. Where to start with my xmas adventure I headed down to the beach with a few friends were we stayed in a guest house extremely cheap which was for various reasons that I will not to go into to much detail bc im sure most of you don’t want to know what the smell was in my room either do I lets just hope it was no toxic jk. Among the people who came was my friends host brother from training we kindly refer to him as our Khmer babysitter lol bc all of us are more roll with whatever happens sort of people he always makes sure we don’t roll with the flow somewhere to bad and it’s a plus him speaking Khmer not getting ripped off. In true style xmas eve I did something I didn’t think was possible in Cambodia I went to the movies and saw harry potter nothing much better then that is all I have to say of course this was a Cambodian movie theater while the movie was in eng it was a bootleg dvd they play on a screen the size of a movie and the chairs were the big circle ones soo comfy I wish American movie theaters let you have couches to watch movies on. I think I might have mentioned that Khmer people get up with the chickens so needless to say come xmas morning the first person up was the Cambodian to scream merry xmas it was pretty funny I think he was just excited to have a reason to celebrate the holiday while that was all happening we were like lets sleep at least till 7 that’s late Cambodian time. That day I had pumpkin pancakes with real Mable syrup for breakfast it was amazing!!! I still have no idea where this syrup came from but so happy to have it then we went walking around found some used book stores and some other cool shops after that we headed for a fun filled day on the beach where laying in much of the sun as the Cambodian would allow us u know Cambodians fear of the sun and turning the “black color” did not let us be in direct sun light just not the Cambodian way haha. Incase your wondering no Cambodians can not swim but they solved this little issue by having floating tubes and life jackets you can wear in the water incase you get scared that you will sink in 3 ft of water. They don’t own bathing suits either they just wear clothes in the water I think I told you the story a while ago of my training host mom and the pictures I had from the beach how she did not believe it was a bathing suit but just a bra underwear sort of a deal lol keep in mind if I wear something with no sleeve’s for the day I get told that I am dressed very sexy. The only thing that could have made the day better was if I could have surfed however though much asking around and even trying to explain it in khmer I had to admit defeat however with the realization of one idea closed I set my focuses on going scuba diving the next day. That night a bunch of us got together and had dinner where non of the staff spoke Khmer which was pretty ironic since so the tables turned and the Cambodian had to relay more on us to do the English speaking but all I could think that has to suck to be in your own country and be denied your own la. For dinner I had for the first time barracuda fish it was really good I forgot how much I like fish bc at site I cant eat fish due to the fact they put more msg into the fish to keep it from going bad then the lbs of fish one bit of a fish at dinner at my site and you might be dehydrated jkjkj but its pretty bad. After dinner I took a tuk tuk to meet up with some other volunteers that I am friends with had a few drinks and then went for a night time walk on the beach were we encountered two monkeys and a dog it was like a you tube video happening right in front of my eyes. We watched the dog and monkey play for a good 20 mins no lie it was like you just could not look away well the monkey had some sort of stick the dog was interested in but the monkey was more interested in messing with the dog so it would leave the stick on the ground for the dog to go after and as soon as that happened the monkey would jump on top of the dog to get back the stick a few times the monkey would hop around the dog and touch his head and run away it was soooo funny to watch im sure my story does not do it justices anyways eventually the bar owner comes over and takes the stick away completely well now the dog is no longer interested in hanging around however the monkey would not have this every time the dog tried to go away the monkey would pull him back by his tail. There was fire works and other on goings at the beach but I knew I had to go back to the guesthouse for some shut eye bc I set further plans for my scuba diving adventure. When I got back however the taro cards where out for some random readings this has been going on all weekend us making shit up with the cards about what will happen next all and all an amazing xmas day.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Rocking around the (palm tree)

While everyone in American is scrambling around to get last min gifts and party favors I am taking the Cambodian rout this xmas and planning my xmas get away to the beach! Since I cant have the white snow why not the white sandy beach of Cambodia with some like-minded individuals from the Peace Corps. I know you all want to hate me right now but I will make you feel a little less jealous when I tell you all about my insect and hunting encounters of the 4th kind so while you all are enjoying your egg nog I was hunting rats that’s right rats and scorpions. Where to begin well okay first off the electricity at site as been really bad lately keeps going off at all the wrong times making life some what hard have had to use my electric tennis racket with a flash light quite a bit anyways this was yet another night when I had no electricity I was sitting out side with my sister when I saw a rat come around the house and I was like don’t do it in my head but it did… so now what do I do? I see this sucker go into my house I have to get it out mind u a month ago I had to get to mice out I did this with the electric racket and they never came back scared them enough I guess lets hope the same thing happens to this rat. Okay so while im rat hunting what do I see in the corner but a baby scorpion I might have ignored it but just a week ago another baby appeared by my shoes now what if I stepped into said shoe and it was in their I know you don’t want to think about it either do I. well anyways now that this is the second baby in a week I have seen chilling in my house all I can think is before I killed their mom u remember the story of the giant black scorpion under my bag well im convinced she laid eggs somewhere or how else did they all start to show up at the same time and size they are form the same hatched eggs I just hope its her bc at least I know she is dead but if there is another mom around that’s something ill deal with when I see it which I hope is never. Okay so I take care of one issue at a time scorpion dead with my sisters help quick and easy now the rat im looking around cant find it and suddenly I see it beady eyes and try to shock it with my racket but it got the point quick enough and left my house so issue number two down. Still no lights so I go back out side to sit in the cold I know its not snow cold but it is actually cold these past few days and I swear my showers in the ams r pretty deathly however what is funny is I just happen to get cold really easily so Cambodians think this is the funniest thing ever. They have the idea that it snows all year round in America its hard to get them to understand that America is so very big and different states have different tempters due to the fact in their mind it snows all year round they think I should always be warm so the fact that I am so very cold wearing sweat shirts while they still can wear short sleeves kills them I just keep telling them that I don’t leave my house in the winter. The other day at work there was this cute puppy I was playing with and this started the staff asking me if I had a dog in America I had to tell them know to explain all the reasons I don’t have a dog would be to hard but to say they are expensive is easy however not a concept they understand in Cambodia since you can just pick dogs off the street for free why in gods name would one have to pay for a dog then I told them the dog need to get shots and things and this is when I saw some of the funniest face I have seen in a while like they really thought I was joking like they really think American’s are crazy. O yes before I forget if your still looking for that last min gift look no further turns out if cnn did no capture the Phnom Penh bridge disaster you can now buy it for all your family to share on dvd or in my case sit on a taxi for two hours and have the awesome privilege to see said dvd when you think you have seen it all there is always something around the bend until next time peace out from the other side of the world.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

True life I have reached Creeper status

Okay so after a long trip back to site having to have the same repetitive conversations I was sort of ready just to pass out however my family wanted to really talk to me. I was taken a back at first bc even my host mom who never really is excited to see me was happy when I got out of the taxi. There is a reason behind this sudden change in behavior I think well Cambodians know all the on goings with you and Jentee is my best friend at site but im sure they hear things though her so I don’t really say much as far as my family life is concerned to her bc her dad and my dad are friends however be4 leaving I talked a lot about my family in prey chore this leads to my family feeling well she should not miss them or its bad that she says that she misses them losing face sort of deal. Well when I got home my sisters started to talk to me about weddings and dancing and then asked me to see her wedding pics which have to say not so pretty my sisters are soo pretty however these pictures are not bc they have there face painted all white and all this fake stuff on man I wish they knew that is not pretty natural is better but different culture different views. So while looking though the pictures I understand more of the family dynamics so she is still married but does not like her husband any more so that’s why he does not live with her and my other sister with the 4 kids also similar situation but I think its more of the husbands wanting to be separate however u know my khmer is not amazing so I could have mixed that up some. I also found out that I guess I had a brother who was killed in a moto accident after trip down memory lane they wanted me to go for a walk to go see the dancing at the wedding aka when my creeper status started luckily I was not the only one standing behind a fence watching dancing however I was the only American doing so what this means is that I was in no way able to just hide away from the fact that I was their. Despite being be hind the fence in the dark this did not stop people from trying to get me to join the wedding party aka wedding crash when that didn’t happen they saw me try to sit Khmer style and how awkward I looked so they had to bring me at a chair I really need to get better sitting like a Khmer person. Even though I just got back to site xmas and new years are coming up so I have been trying to figure out what to do originally I thought about doing the beach for new years but I think now I might go for xmas instead although my Khmer friends invited me to phenom penh so ill have to figure that out and hopefully have enough money for travel. There is a first time for everything today when I was sitting at the market stall two English speaking people stopped by no one ever stops by to sit and do anything bc there are places in less then a mile that are way better anyways had interesting Convo with them and also I think it might be the universe sign. What I mean by this is that one of the girl was telling me how she has been living all over Asia for the last 10 years doest see how she could go back to Australia I keep about thinking about saying in Cambodia and I always joke to people that ill stay for 10 years so maybe me bumping into these two girls means something I dunno. I have to say its so very crazy to think its that time of year shopping crazy and how much it just feels like an extended summer in my mind though when I went traveling though the city in Cambodia they have xmas music and lights all over the place and all the people who work at many of the stores all wear Santa hats I found out today the word for Christmas in Khmer is noel its just funny bc in Cambodia they are not a wear of the war on xmas so they really keep it Christmas and play real Christian music its amusing to see globalization at work. Peace out from the other side of the world!

IT’S LIKE GOING TO MCCDONALDS ON A DIET

You know when you are like o I am on a diet but a friend then invites u to some fast food restraunt and in ur state of denial you like o I can go and not eat their but u know that you most deff are. Why I bring this analogy up is bc I was soooooo soo excited to see my host parents and I thought I could just go and not be sad that I don’t live their anymore but that was denial just like the fat kid denying them selves fast food. So I went to Phnom Penh first and then left bc I cant go straight from my site their and met up with my friend liz and her older host brother you can tell I have been in Cambodia to long I have to mention that he is her older host brother or in Cambodia bong haha. Due to the fact he was with us I didn’t have to do so much work to get the taxi etc however it took 5 hours for the taxi to fill up so I didn’t get into prey chore until 7 Friday night and there was still the extra excitement if my host parents really understood I was coming bc me and them have a really good charades system but that system is pretty useless over the phone lucky they actually understood and were waiting up for me my host mom was so excited it was cute she ran up and hugged me I mention this bc Cambodians r not really huggers at least I was no excepting it just planning a normal bow. First things they told me were I have more black spots now I am no longer fat and I speak more Khmer just a normal way to start off seeing someone again right haha its like all the things u want to tell someone when u have not seen them in a while they just blurt out in the first 5 mins. My host mom is not like most Khmer woman and what I mean by this she is totally cool with me teaching her in appropriate things or having crazy convos with me, which I would never have at site however sometimes I do wonder how I mange to explain these things to her but lets just saying when she wants to ask further about some of the topics we talk about she will do some charades and its to funny use your imagination to explain the way Americans are and how someone might act it out. It was nice to have real conversations all weekend long to all the people that live around us also sit around and just have random convos with me and even though I know it must be hard to sit and have me understand Khmer they still do and that’s one thing that makes me sort of really upset about not having that at my site now with my family. I guess its really hard for me to explain what a human being has to offer or the little things u can just pick up on when your around them so while I may never be able to have you understand in words if you spend a few mins with both my families you would see the difference. I also noticed that when I got to site that my blogs became a lot less its not so much me getting used to Cambodia but having less random conversations to report on but I deiced I am going to put forth more effort to find some crazy khmer people to chat it up with at site it may not be my family but there are a lot of people around site that are always talking to me so a lot of opportunity to reach out. Anyways back to my trip I got to see all the market people I was friends with they were happy to see me one of my freinds eggo is prego 3 months so she was pretty excited to tell me about that they were all telling me I should try to transfer back to prey chore if only in peace corps let you choose haha I was like yea its not really up to me but Cambodians love when u are just happy like they always assume that being American I would be home sick and not like Cambodia but when I tell them how much I love Cambodia this makes them so happy. On a down word note the café lady I wrote about somewhere in the blog archives stop selling coffee when I told my host mom I was like I will cry jkjk but I think my host mom thought I was really that sad I have to learn how to say just kidding. Its crazy to go back to a place to see everything is pretty much the same I went back to the school a lot of the kids still remember me I played some soccer I guess according to the volunteer who lives in prey chore the kids ask about me and I get random text messages from them although I have no idea who they are. My house in prey chore is a place that a lot of kids came to bc we had the photo booth so I met a lot of people this way I really miss that aspect of where I lived but I guess its always a give and take bc I also lived in the middle of metal work shop 101 now I live in a more peaceful environment but you know me I am a crazy New Yorker I will take the loud and the crazy over the peaceful and calm quite any day of the week. My host dad really likes to play dos sigh aka American hacky sack but when I lived with them I did not know what it was however now that I play it everyday I had the dos sigh with me and got him to play it was pretty chill my host dad in prey chore is the opposite of that of my dad at site he is just way more loud and crazy willing to talk to me I don’t make him nervous where my host dad at site is scared of me doest really like to say more then 2 words to me I used to sort of be like humm maybe I can have him get used to me but now I think its his personality bc he doest really talk to my sibling either. That morning before I left my mom spent the whole time showing me pictures of all these weddings and things and she even had some pictures from when her and my host dad were really young it was pretty cool to see at one point I asked if she had wedding pictures and she just turned and said total straight face pol pot like not even I don’t have but just that and I was like dam but she had pictures from that time period she has picture of her self pregnant and what not she was really beautiful when she was younger I am sure who ever comes to see me will get a trip to prey chore and can see it for your self. Sunday I had to head back my plan was just to do what I always do stand on some high way waving down a taxi but my host mom thought this was to funny and was like no u can sit in the drive way we can get you a taxi well in the end after an hour or so of waiting I had to go to my original plan and get a rd side taxi. I felt it was a more roomy taxi ride compared to how I deal most times. I had to take two separate taxis once I got into phnom penh I didn’t go find a taxi ride just walked around a bit got some food and then I went into lucky supper market. I really wanted to pick some stuff to take back to site however I could not afford anything in that place Cambodians always tell me how expensive supper markets are but I had no idea I wanted to buy some peanut butter to tide me over till I get some of my xmas gifts and a tiny tiny jar cost 8 dollars and cereal was 6 granted I understand this stuff has to be shipped but one would think there has to be some Asian brands of this stuff so I can pay a normal price bc Cambodian can’t afford the stuff they were selling it really must just be for the tourist bc I just don’t understand how they could keep said place open if it was ment for Cambodians. Well after my adventure to prey chore it was a nice way to look back and see what I have done since coming to Cambodia and keep my self focus of what I want to get done but also to remind me that even with limited skills in many things I was able to really connect with people their and I want to make sure to do the same at site.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

What it Feels to for a Girl

“Girls can wear jeans And cut their hair short Wear shirts and boots'Cause it's OK to be a boy But for a boy to look like a girl is degrading 'Cause you think that being a girl is degrading But secretly you'd love to know what it's like Wouldn't you What it feels like for a girl” Madonna. So something that never seems to stop plaguing my mind is the very concept of gender and what the world would be like if we did not build up this system of male and female. Granted being possibly over educated in women studies only drives these thoughts further but never the less im in a new culture with a whole new set of gender norms and I really do have to ask why do we in modern day and age still try to keep them so defined. Last night instead of learning Khmer I ended up having over an hour debate with my Khmer teacher talking about this very thing it all started bc I guess there is some dance coming up that all the teenagers are excited about but he was telling me he has no girl friend in the village so he would never be at the dance so he could basically care less about this dance. And then he asked me why I was wearing socks was I cold and asked why khmer woman wear socks and im like try not to be “the black color” and this made me bring up if culturally ideal to be white then why do Khmer men not try to be white? He was like we think white is beautiful and I was like I get that but in America people like when both male and female are tan however if that’s the ideal both try to attracted the opposite sex. Then he bought up that the man has his choice at women so it doest matter I said yea but she can reject you and he said yes but if they really want to purse they can just go to the parents. He proceeded decided to tell me how hard it is for him the man in Cambodia culture well then the doors to hell opened and the battle of the genders started jk. He was protesting to me that he thinks it unfair that Cambodian men must get all the money and then pay the brides parents I think it was 2000 dollars if he want to marry her then he went on about being the bread winner etc. well I have heard this whole dowry price before but I was confused bc Cambodians make on average 1000 dollars a year so asked how does a Cambodian man come up with the money? He told me that they will sell a cow or a part of the land off humm he did’t seem to see the issue with this so I had to help him make the wheels turn. I was like well if you feel its so unfair that you must pay how would you like knowing your human worth to your family is the same as an animal that of a cow not that im not saying for a Cambodian man that 2000 dollar is not a lot of money but when it comes to a humans value would you want to be worth 2000 dollar or priceless? He thought for a min and was like I never thought about that but I guess your right I would not want to be worth the family cow. Next he told me also sometimes the men are lazy and if they pay the money they will make the wife go to work and pay back the 2000 dollars and I was like yea you keep talking about the man being responsible for bring money home for the family but how come everywhere I turn all I see men do is work for a few hours and drink when all the women work all day long and are still responsible for cooking cleaning and taking care of all the husbands needs? He tried to tell me it is only like this in svay and I was like no I don’t think so but he is from phenom penh so he was trying to say its not like that their and I said yea but that doest really count that’s like a different world from the small villages of Cambodia and I went on to tell him many of volunteers that live in small villages see the same thing I do. This left him thinking and he said well the concept behind this is that the man should want to get a job to take care of his family and that is supposed to be a good thing. I said ill take that granted do you realize that how unrealistic that chivalrous idea of the man and woman don’t exist not just in Cambodia but all over the world each person is out from them selves to think that either person wants to be put in this position where they want to take on solely one roll limits both sides. I should also mention he just was dumped by his girl friend who he wanted to marry bc he did not spend enough time with her or something and bc he is a student he could not pay for her etc so he has the chance to start all over with who he picks so after the conversation he decided he wants more of an equal relationship so I may have learned no Khmer yesterday night which is what I pay him for but I might have changed his whole view on woman and men and for that I will say priceless.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

This is not an Asia brand…

You know it takes a lot of over thinking things as a volunteer for a few reason you are always trying to be culturally sensitive and make sure it can relate to my target audience so to speak however sometimes there are things that just completlly miss my mind. DEC is HIV/AIDS awareness month so I was supposed to do something for it today had a few things together anyways never happened bc as I mentioned I think in another post they are trying to get money for this new maternity ward and randomly throw together meetings naturally not informing me. The nurse who does the presentations with me showed up bc he new the od was gonna be there to over see, the od is not awear he goes to school instead of coming to work so its this whole hush hush thing the staff plays at the hospital but since he was there I decided to show him some of what I had ready. Well part of my presentation was to show how to use condoms properly and I bought some extra to give away and when I say bought I mean I took from my peace corps medical kit the 6 condoms they gave us figured I don’t need them convenient (though im sure peace corps would not be happy with this) not to mention I don’t want the whole villiage to think I am out buying bulk condoms at the pharmacy and be considered a “broken girl”. However when I showed them to the nurse he was like I think these are American condoms and I was like no its okay they’re not American brad anyways but he was like no there not Asian condoms…. Im looking at him like don’t worry about what brad they are bc I am slow and was not getting it he had to finally spell it out for me these are to big lmao and then he laughs and I cant control my self bc I re think over the whole conversation and it all starts to add up. Well the harvesting of the rice has started I went for one of my forbidden walks into the middle of nowhere to see the process Cambodians really think I am going to get kidnapped u should see them miming it out to me so I always just go and anyways I ended up meeting these kids who were so excited that I had a camera they were bring me all over the places to take pictures getting me into a Water Mellon field it was a lot of fun it was also cute to see these kids planting they were like don’t step on the watermelon trees and were showing me how they were breaking up the sand they spoke pretty good English to. Soon enough I was a good 3 or so kilos out and it started to down pour so me and all the kids had to walk back they were also bring in the cows so it was a slow walk but I guess once ur wet ur wet they were telling me some interesting things as we walked. However wat surprised me was okay so I am the american walking in the rain so this is so sad so people would offer me to come under there house etc to come in from the rain but no one offered these poor kids they would just ask me and bc I was walking with them I was not about to go in and like said once ur rained on mine as well just keep walking. This weekend is a long weekend bc Friday is humans rights day which gives Cambodians yet another day so a few of us are taking advantage and going back to training site to see our host families however to explain this to my host family I have no idea if they understood what I way saying so might have to re talk to them to make sure they really know I am coming I will update u with that story next till next time peace out from the other side of the world!


Thursday, December 2, 2010

I Had Thanksgiving with Brad pit jk


Okay now that I have your attention so thanksgiving was interesting in Cambodia try to imagine making thanksgiving dinner with out massive oven and stove tops etc as you all know I don’t cook to begin with so I cant imagine the amount of work some people put in to make the turkeys (ill shout out a thanks to them). For thanksgiving we were all shipped off to Battambong 4 hours away from phnom penh to do some more cultural and la training and in between meet up with all the other volunteers and enjoy a thanks giving feast. For the meeting up with volunteers had a lot of fun ate some western food however going back to the way things were in training sort of sucked and hear is why… while there is some good information a lot of it is repetitive and not needed, there is so much generalization to listen to while it was hard in training to swallow its even harder now that I live at site and I kinda wonder what type of Cambodians the staff is around, then some people think questioning the hell out of peace corps staff is going to get them answers when it should be more obvious now that they don’t have answers that one might really want to know, then there is times when we need to stick on what were talking about but we have to move on to learn about the reparative stuff, then you sort of get used to ur own way of live in a small village well I don’t want to generalize so I will say I have and when you have freedom and you spend all days with Cambodians its some what frustrating to deal with that many Americans at once no lie. I know a lot of you are sitting and reading this being like ahhh whats wrong with her but its hard to explain bc each person could live exactly as I live and not feel this way however it is just the way I go about living life that makes it so that I understand my new life a bit better then what I left behind and being alone and relying more on actions then just talk has made life better for me. Never the less I am grateful for getting to take a trek around Cambodia which of course with traveling and me always a story bc I was going far away I could have taken a bus however it cost 6 dollars from my site and I was like nope I can take a taxi cheaper even if I have to stand on the side of the road for an hour (quick side note iam supper happy that I learned how to hitch hike in college it has been one of the best tools I could use in Cambodia!) however Cambodians try to talk me out of this just bc the taxi is a tight squeez 3 or 4 in front and 4 in the back of a roomie taoyota =) well after 45 mins I thought mabey I should have not been stubborn and taken the bus however as is anything in Cambodia patients in a virtue and then the stars aliened for me better then a taxi peace corps Armageddon cars (I refer to it in this manner bc out of all the countries ngos etc in Cambodia no one quite can compete with peace corps van its got a snorkel and some other interesting additive that make it scream out when it passes by) anyways it took a few to pass before I got one to stop for me so I lucked out I think ill say its one of the benefits to living on the national rd so close to pp they always pass by me site. Okay I realize I have not posted in a while so trying to run down how much I have been trying to do with thus far little success well tom shoes I have to email them I have been trying to talk to usaid with no phone calls returned and then I talked to someone who is in charge of us as volunteers and she said she knows people at the embassy and that most likely they could help so a step in a direction. Pass back has not sent me any emails and my other project that I sent the most emails to is to get a pocket size projector for my mac for health edu at my health center I really thought bill gates foundation could have hooked me up but they told me no that I would have to apply for a grant as for other organizations I got even worse feed back so ill have to see with that. On a postive note I met this guy at the school he is an eng teacher and he wants to start up a first aid class so I think we might work together which is exciting my first random counter part not inside the hospital he seemed reliable to I guess he has worked for many ngos so feel this could be a good connect also 411 if your wondering u don’t actually have to be certified to teach cpr etc in Cambodia so my knowledge is considered good enough luckily for them I actually did get certified by red cross better then nothing at all =) on a crazy note I talked with the midwives today with my nurse that speaks eng and im going to start some training as a midwife will not be long until I can deliver a baby jkjk but who knows in Cambodia they try to get me to do a lot of stuff so I figured I cant resist the whole two years that I should pick some things and actually get trained. I sort of wish I could go somewhere to get trained better for breast cancer bc around the community since it was my first project that’s what im know for aka why people flash me all the time now lol but I have no idea really how to tell all the different types of lumps in America that’s when im like dude u need to go see a dr but in Cambodia that’s when they come to see me that’s a pretty scary thought. I will let that thought metal in your head till next time peace out from the other side of the world!